Is how I would like to feel.. Look how happy Jim looks…
Last week I got knocked back with a flu that had my insides feeling like they’d been put through a trash compactor. And so I cleared my calendar and literally stayed in bed for 36 hours. Thinking it was enough, I filled the following days with the things I’d cancelled and then some.
So now, it’s Tuesday and guess who spent the day in bed? Again. This girl.
The worst is that my brain is overcompensating for what my body can’t do by playing the lineup of everything I’m behing and all the calls + emails I haven’t made. Urgh.
The saving grace is that I didn’t skimp on my Sunday food prep and I’ve got brown rice, roasted sweet potatoes enough to last the week. So at least I can eat, and the kids are in school. Those be the silver linings. BUT WHAT ABOUT MY BUDDING CALLIGRAPHY PRACTICE. WHAT ABOUT ALL MY COMMITMENTS? WHAT ABOUT THE THREE NEW JOBS THAT JUST STARTED?????
DAMMIT. I ALREADY TOOK TWO DAYS OFF! And the dread of cancelling and bailing on things ways so heavily on me this time. I’m usually much more ok with allowing this stuff to happen, but this time it’s hitting hard.
Maybe the PMS isn’t helping. Or all the new gray hair, and the terrible sick girl complexion.
Aware that this post is nothing more than 75% wailing and 25% self-pity, I’ll lighting things up with my latest reading companions:
In all the time spent in bed, I finished this book (amazingly crafted, but it wasn’t really for me, the child narrative was heavy and I had not much attachment to the mother’s character)
And right before that I blew through this (loved 85%, disappointed that it was a series of essays)
But my favorite of the January reading list BY FAR has been this…
You have to be ok with Sheep Men, parallel realities and missing prostitutes and children of artists. As 1Q84 wasn’t for everyone, this isn’t either, but it’s a wonderful world to get lost in.
And because it’s almost garden planning… I’ve stocked up on some gardening books at the library, my all time favorite being
February brings garden plans, seed sales and seedlings.
So the books help ease the sick days anxiety, the internet DOES NOT. I can tell you that my sleep does not benefit from hour long spirals into IG or Pinterest… no sir. You come up with crazy ideas about dyeing your hair gray and hosting macrame workshops.
But first steps first.
Get. Better. Think of How Happy Jim Looks.